Endings are usually not as exciting as beginnings. I am often reminded of George Bernard Shaw’s comment about personal attraction: “any fool can start a love affair, but it takes a genius to end one successfully.”
My personal feeling is that getting the quality of the ending as good as possible prepares the best foundation for the next beginning.
I have been thinking about endings recently because my brothers and I have been clearing out what was effectively our parents’ home. Decisions have had to be made and actions taken but it has been important to acknowledge feelings. These have been made more complex because the surviving partner – my stepmother – is happily living a few miles away. It is not death which has been the catalyst but dementia.
Endings are important in business, too. We often think simply about “end of the month” or “end of the year” but there are many endings to get right.
1. Ending of a relationship with a customer. Relationships with customers can go sour or simply lose impact. Even if the customer is happy it is better to draw the relationship to a close (or create an exit opportunity) rather than simply continue to take money. Where a customer relationship goes wrong dignity and courage is needed to prevent on-going damage. As the business owner it is our responsibility to take the initiative, and create the appropriate ending so that both sides can win. Apart from creating good karma this makes excellent business sense as new relationships and referrals are more likely to follow. Sometimes it is better to lose the battle to win the war.
2. Finishing a Project. Very often one piece of business can flow into another leading to false assumptions. It is always better in my experience to conclude one phase, provide the feedback or the final phase of the project rather than simply bolting on the new one. In the corporate world this is less likely to happen, but in the small business market the urgency of the new is often very seductive to both sides.
3. Taking leave of peers and colleagues. I have recently left a networking group which I had been in for many years. During that time there were many leavings and remarkably few where the leaver left with an enhanced reputation. A courteous email or phone call which respects the relationships works wonders and is so simple. Leaving is normal, endings are normal, and we all want to say goodbye, or have a chance to say goodbye to others. Where colleagues left without a word both they and the group were at a disadvantage. Leaving provides a point of communication which can help to keep relationships alive in the next phase. In my experience the women were on the whole more capable of leaving well!
4. Completion of internal Focus or Campaign. Finishing one phase involves tidying up afterwards and thinking about what has happened. Your own approach can be looked at and of course testimonials sought, and the desk or files cleaned. This helps to bring one phase to a conclusion and combat overwhelm.
A period of downtime is needed before the next beginning. It is the equivalent of wiping the tools down with oil and checking the sharpness of the blades, or of finally looking round the newly decorated room before bringing in the furniture again. Particularly if you are a one man band business it is important to feel the sense of rhythm and re-charge the batteries which helps to keep the quality of work high.
5. End of the conversation. On the phone or at the end of the meeting it is woth giving some thought to the conclusion, so that both sides feel satisfied and there is a clear next step. At face to face networking events most of us have experienced the stare over the shoulder when somebody didn’t know how to get out of a conversation but was already planning an escape route. It doesn’t make anyone feel good.
An ending will always involve change, or loss. Many people think it will be easier to ignore endings or resist them so they can avoid change and difficult emotions. In fact if the emotions are not faced the ending is not complete, the spark in us dies, and the issues can continue to re-surface. Endings where the feelings have been experienced create the fuel for the next beginning and helps us to move forward with more confidence, competence and generosity. That helps our business to develop and attract the next level of customers and partners.
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